Remember when I used to post in a timely manner? Haaaa, memories. Really, to the nearly 80,000 regular readers out there, I apologize for taking a month off; I had to go wash my hair. All right, let’s see if I still know how to do this.
hiiasnao .. oaswepq9 93
Nope, let’s try again.
You read the title correctly. On an average day, love doesn’t really belong in the Trivia folder of life’s filing cabinet, but I want you to think about it differently while I’ve got this light grasp on your miserably short attention span. First of all, I don’t care what love means to you. You could view it as a reusable coupon into a lady’s passion canal. Maybe to you, love is believing in the same god(s). It could mean having someone 100% loyal to your desires (emotional slavery). And what about the assmunches who quantify love with gifts? That’s fine, too. For every single one of you, love is trivial.
Sure, love is subjective to the lover, but we can probz come to the same conclusion that love represents some type of deep, exclusive connection between human beings (I don’t know/care if guinea pigs are capable of loving one another). So if you validate your feelings with superficialities like diamonds, boobs, cash, social status, shoes, paying for dinner, orgasms, or having the same favorite things, there’s not very much hope for you. In fact, save yourself some trouble by averting your gaze from the rest of this post, checking out Kim Kardashian’s Twitter account, and reading all of the reasons why substantiating love with any of those things is a shitty choice. “I got what you need what what you need”. Really, Kim? Do you?
No, you have to be a love proctologist and reeeeally peer into your heart’s b-hole to get anything out of this idea. Let’s rattle off some “real” reasons why one might love another. You might have the same goals or ambitions. There very well could be a religious, political, or philosophical connection that bonds you to someone. His/her personality might bring out your best version of your own personality. Someone’s discipline might help keep you on the right path. There might be a void filled after the loss of another. All of these sound legitimate, but guess what? You can blanket them all under the same idea: self-validation.
Sigh… it’s probably sad to think about it this way, but isn’t it kind of burden-removing to be realistic? Especially in a society that LITERALLY OVER-DRAMATIZES EEEEVVVVVEEEEERRRRYYYYYTTTTTHHHHHIIIIINNNNGGGG. But we’re all searching for validation because it gives us a better idea of where we stand amongst our peers. Having an exclusive relationship with an important person (for whatever reason) elevates your status; it’s one of many benefits of a relationship that can be traced back to survival instincts. Here’s my point: if you require another person’s exclusivity and loyalty to feel good about your social standing, then YOU are trivial. We call that a “parasite” in the biz.
“Gee whiz, that was mean. Why do you hate love so much? And what’s the point of it?” -you, I’d guess. Well, what about this? If you can wade past the endless marsh of superficial bullshit spewing from American television, and if you can find validation from within, rather than using another person’s heart to feel cool, then I think you’ve figured it out. Have I? Not even close, pilgrim. But guess what? There are a lot of people out there who know how to avoid those aforementioned negatives. I think that, when you understand that love as we know it is trivial, you open yourself up to the idea that *actual* love comes from a deep-seated need to be selfless. Get the hell out of Zales for a minute and try it out.
What gives? A post that was more than 10% serious? I know, I know. But fear not, young reader. Poop/boner jokes are on the horizon.
Thus, the pursuit of trivia continues.